Debra LaFave is Hot!

She really is. And who cares if she had sex with a 15 year old, I am sure HE doesn't care. I think her real crime is being so dang hot. I am not even gonna try to be witty or funny. She is just hot. Though this is not entirely a timely story, she is back in the news for some reason. I think its just because she is hot.

Stupid Clinton Voters...

A poll by Fox News (yes yes scoff all you want, but surprisingly enough Fox News pulls off very unbiased polls. (on the other hand, how do you measure unbiasedness?)) shows that 55% of people are at planning on voting for Hilary Clinton will do so because she has the 'right experience.'

Wait a minute? What experience does she have? That answer to that question is the same as this question...

How many more words am I going to type today?

Sweet Baby Jesus!

And by Sweet Baby Jesus I mean Sweet baby with 8 limbs! (Oh my gosh!)
And I also mean Sweet Baby With Two Heads! (Dear Me!)

What is this world coming to!?!?

Screw the Metric system!

That's right. Metric sucks. And here is why... because people tell me it is better. It is the exact same reason I hate Macs, The Patriots, and fuel efficient cars. The instant you tell me I should change my ways to do something 'better' I take a silent but still very binding vow to never ever do it as long as you still think it is the better way. I honestly don't care that in ten years Hispanics will be the largest minority group in America, I refuse to learn Spanish because people keep telling me I should! Dang straight I should, but if anyone is gonna tell me what I should do, you can bet your sissy bilingual butt its gonna be me!

And I honestly don't give a piece of jack squat if the metric system is more 'logical.' Let me share with you a story..

Once there was a boy born in America. And he grew to be 6 feet 1 inch, he walked 1 mile to school everyday, and he once ate a 3 pound steak. And when he died, he never regretted not learning the metric system. The End.

How many of you metric swine ever really suffered because America uses the English system, or what I fondly refer to as the "Right system". The only argument for switching to the metric system is it is more logical, and I think we can all agree that logic has no place in America if it means changing the current system. The day I die will be the day I am okay with America being metric... which brings me to a serious question.

On that day will I be 6 feet under or roughly 2 meters under?

Chinese Toys! A Pedopihls Dream!

That is right, not only are Chinese made toys threatening out ecomony and making our children susceptible to sickness, but also more susceptible to rape! Turns out that some Matell product has been recalled because it contains a chemical that is found in and has the same effect as the date rape drug GHB. Pedophiles click here!

Could this all be a ploy by the Chinese to slowly but surely destroy our security in America? It's not likely but I am going to chose to believe it. Regardless of Chinese intentions, children beware!
The Chinese might have your safety in mind (Actually they really dont, heres the link yet again!) but I am pretty sure Uncle Jimmy doesn't. If you don't prepare yourself this could be a Christmas remembered forever... but then again maybe not. It is a date rape drug...

More things you can't bring on planes

I guess that headline is a little misleading. I am changing it to "more things you can't do on a plane" Why didn't I really change the headline you ask? Well, because you really can't do anything on a plane anyway. You can't shoot guns. You can't practice knife throwing. And you definitely can't knit! My one consolation was that you could still engage in sexual activities in the romantic setting of the lavatory. And then i heard that some planes have beds in first class! Eureka! There still was a way to pass the time on an airplane.

But Japanese airlines have to take all the fun out of flying. SEX-the aptly named hyperlink

First, what do they expect people to do on these beds anyway? The only reason I see for adding them is the first place is to facilitate to the needs of the mile-high club members. Secondly, how are going to people fly? How are they going to entertain themselves within the confines of an airplane without have rampant sex!?

I don't know. What is this world coming to? I blame the terrorists

Does anyone else remember the USS Cole?

I sure as heck do! And last I checked the federal government cared because there was a multi-million dollar bounty on the people who planned it's heads! Well... Yemen seems to have forgotten.

I am not even gonna put a fancy hyperlink in, just the plain URL that is how pissed I am!
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/middle_east/7065074.stm

There! Yemen is releasing this terrorist for reasons I cant even begin to imagine! I was under the impression that people responsible for killing 17 people suck and should go to jail. The only way i can see this being a good thing is the 5 million dollar bounty on his head. Maybe this could be the jump start for the Michigan economy we have all been waiting for. So, if anyone else is interested I am on my way to Yemen, for the sake of common dignity and the economic welfare of Michigan.